I’ve been doing online dating for over two years, but yet to find love. Can you recommend any other places I can try?

Dan & Caroline August 27, 2012
I’ve been doing online dating for over two years, but yet to find love. Can you recommend any other places I can try?

Dan says

“Sure. I think around 70% of people meet their partners through social circles. While internet dating makes up for 15 – 17% these days. I know where I’d be investing my time… grow your social network.

On another note, the fact that you’ve been online dating for two years and yet to meet someone of note says to me that you’re too focused on looking for someone to make you happy rather than becoming someone that makes you happy. Focus on the later and not only will you meet someone amazing but we’d all like to hang out with you a little more :-)

Caroline says

“As my mother used to say, men are like buses – there’s another one coming every 10 minutes. Single available people are every where, you just need to start looking. Get off your god-damn computer and get out in the world. And while you are out there, get off your f@%king phone and engage with who you come across.

Look people in the eye and smile, be open and talk to the people you run into. The men that I have had the deepest connections with were ones I met by chance. I was friendly, flirty and open to them so they felt safe in asking me out. Or shock horror, I actually instigated seeing them again. If I had been on my phone or busy bitching to my friends about the so called man-drought and how all the good men are taken – those relationships would have never happened.

I personally recommend speed dating as a way to meet people. It saves a lot of time compared to online dating. I can’t count how many times I felt a connection with someone online, enjoyed talking to them on the phone, then met and felt nothing. With speed dating you know if there is chemistry in 10 seconds.

I am also a big believer in making a list of your perfect mate. I did this recently and also added the date I would meet him by. I then met a man who is everything on the list and now happily in a relationship with him. I jokingly tell him I ordered him from the universe, but I really do believe that I attracted him to me.

I think of the universe as a restaurant and you need to put your order in, otherwise you are left sitting at your table bitching about not getting your food but you haven’t let the waiter know what you want. You also need to take a good hard look at your beliefs around love since we attract what we believe. You may have blocks to love that you are not aware of. A good relationship coach or counsellor can help you with that.”